To accompany "Deep Into The Woods" and to start your Sunday morning off with a bit of humor. Here are a few quotes from Jack Handy (sometimes his name is also spelled Handey):

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.

Is there anything more beautiful than a beautiful, beautiful flamingo, flying across in front of a beautiful sunset? And he's carrying a beautiful rose in his beak, and also he's carrying a very beautiful painting with his feet. And also, you're drunk.

If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid seeing yourself in the mirror, because I bet that's what REALLY throws you into a panic.

I wish I would have a real tragic love affair and get so bummed out that I'd just quit my job and become a bum for a few years, because I was thinking about doing that anyway.

If you go flying back through time and you see somebody else flying forward into the future, it's probably best to avoid eye contact.

One thing vampire children have to be taught early on is, don't run with wooden stakes.

I believe in making the world safe for our children, but not our children's children, because I don't think children should be having sex.