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Nope, no time for breakfast -- Wait!

::stuffnstuff
10/28/06 10:02 PM GMT
Pop-Tarts are a flat rectangular toaster pastry approximately 3 in (75 mm) by 4.5 in (115 mm), made by the Kellogg Company. Pop-Tarts have a sugary filling sealed inside two layers of rectangular, thin pastry crust; each layer of this crust is about 0.1 in (2 mm) thick. Most varieties have frosting, but some do not. They can be eaten without being warmed, but are often warmed inside a toaster, or microwave. (More recently, certain varieties have been marketed as tasting best when left to cool in the freezer.) They are usually sold in pairs inside foil packages, and do not require refrigeration.

Pop-Tarts are Kellogg's most popular brand, with more than two billion Pop-Tarts sold each year. According to Kellogg's, Pop-Tarts should always be pronounced as a plural, never "Pop-Tart" in the singular form. They are distributed mainly in the United States, but also in the United Kingdom and Canada. Pop-Tarts were discontinued in Australia in 2005. To some extent, the brand name "Pop-Tart" has become a “genericized” trademark describing any toaster pastry.

Pop-Tarts were originally released a mere six months after Kellogg’s main competitor, Post, began marketing their Country Squares in 1963. These were both influenced by Chinese attempts to enclose dog food in foil in order to keep it fresh without refrigeration. Throughout its now over 40 year campaign, Pop-Tarts have become a part of cultural identity as much as anything. I am personally surprised that Andy Warhol didn’t include them in one of his works, although works by Toulouse- Lautrec, P. Cezanne, and S. Dali have been edited to feature this item.

For years, Pop-Tarts have been a cultural symbol of our generation and its need for immediate satisfaction. Breakfast, or any "meal", doesn't get much easier that this. It is instantly ready to be eaten and can be taken anywhere. Also, the shelf-life is probably longer than the life-cycle of most deep sea turtles. They are packaged in 44 standard flavors, advertising everything from Pokémon™ to artificial fruits, and these are only the full-sugar versions in ordinary shapes.

But, apparently, our society has been pushing the bar on the desire for instant satisfaction: Recently, Kellogg released what they are calling Go-Tarts, a spin-off of the standard Pop-Tarts in snack bar form in order to make it more accessible for the typical American lifestyle. It is believed that this product release was inspired by Go-Gurt, a portable yogurt made by Yoplait (designed for kids), which was released several years ago. One source is quoted as saying, “I’m sorry, I was under the impression that Pop-Tarts were already pretty well-suited to ‘go’ eating. Ask any college student in America — all you need is seventy-five cents for a pair of foil-wrapped -Tarts from the nearest vending machine, and your walk from one class to the next becomes a meal. Sure, they taste better toasted, but eating a raw Pop-Tart never hurt anybody.”

Go-Tarts are currently only available in three flavors, but they can be purchased in nearly ever grocery store in America. Amazon lists similar items as “Kraft Easy Mac Cups, Original, 2.05-Ounce Microwave Cups (Pack of 12)”, “Kool Aid, Assorted, 0.16-Ounce Packets (Pack of 72)”, “Slim Jim Original, 100-Count Box”, and “Pampers Cruisers, Size 3, Economy Plus Pack, 160 Cruisers”.

There is a poorly-veiled comical theme behind this new product. Popular comedian Brian Regan has been known to speak on new products incorporating both peanut butter and jelly in the same Jar: “I gotta try to imagine the guy who needs that! ‘I’m in the mood for a peanut butter and jelly sandwich…nah, I can’t be opening all kinds of jars! I’m not going to be using two knives…’” I personally have a hard time imagining the person needing to eat but not finding the time to unwrap and eat standard Pop-Tarts. As another source said, “Weren’t Pop-Tarts already a ‘to-go’ item?”

Sources: Amazon, The Blue Pages, Detroit News, Jefito Blog, Law.com, Whole Pop Magazine, and Wikipedia
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Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.

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.purmusic
10/28/06 10:09 PM GMT
Uhm ... er ... Luke gets a bowl of Cheerios?

*is confuzzled*

I love Brian Regan and his brother. Now that bit alone in your dissertation here is more than worth the price of admission. Lol.
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
&KEIFER
10/28/06 10:34 PM GMT
you oughta write speeches for President Bush

anybody that can research pop tarts will certainly have figured out that IRAQ had nothing to do with 9/11 and was really about avenging his daddy
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::third_eye
10/28/06 10:38 PM GMT
keith, if i ever meet you face to face, the first thing i'll do is shake your hand. that's what i've been saying for years... with lots of backlash... kinda like when i speak my mind here...
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lately, i've fallen horribly behind in my thanks and comments. I'll catch up, but until I do, please know all your kind words are greatly appreciated.
.purmusic
10/28/06 10:46 PM GMT
Well, I wanna shake Keith's hand too! ... only I wanna also see him wash that hand first.

Got this thing about germs, no reflection on him. :oP
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
::J_272004
10/29/06 1:24 AM GMT
I wanna shake keiths............................................ hand too.. I know what you mean Rob its the same over here if you say what you think, i've had quite a few run-ins too..
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MY GALLERY ........... "Live one day at a time and make it a masterpiece"
&philcUK
10/29/06 1:27 AM GMT
the only pop tart that sells in any numbers in the UK is Christina Aguilera.....
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A smart bomb is only as clever as the idiot that tells it what to do……si vis pacem para bellum.
.CurtieBear
10/29/06 9:58 AM GMT
LOL @ Phil... good one


And like SPAM... no one shall dis the holy Pop Tarts. No one

*Glares at anyone who seeks to dis em'.*
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Don't make me do VooDoo on you. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-haaaa
::Dunstickin
10/29/06 10:19 AM GMT
Pop-Tarts should have a health hazard warning on them!.....I had a nasty burned mouth! coz the 'jam' was still boiling hot! inside it.......Never touched one since?
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*Please forgive me, for not replying to every one of your lovely images-Problems with my hands is making it difficult at present* Dunstickin's Gallery
.purmusic
10/29/06 10:26 AM GMT
*considers adding Pop Tarts to the list of food items along with cookies ... to the much needed amended nutritional guidelines*

Hey! Everyone needs their daily intake of ...

Corn Syrup , Dextrose , High Fructose Corn Syrup , Crackermeal , Water , Modified Wheat Starch , Partially Hydrogenated Soybean Oil , Dried Strawberries , Dried Apples , Dried Pears , Citric Acid , Caramel Color , Red No. 40 , Xanthan Gum , Soy Lecithin , Yellow No. 6 , Enriched Wheat Flour , Sugar , Partially Hydrogenated Soybean Oil , Corn Syrup , Dextrose , Salt , High Fructose Corn Syrup , Leavening , Baking Soda , Sodium Acid Pyrophosphate , Monocalcium Phosphate , Calcium Sulfate , Corn Cereal , Gelatin , Color Added , Red No. 40 , Niacinamide , Reduced Iron , Blue No. 1 , Vitamin A Palmitate , Pyridoxine Hydrochloride Vitamin B6 , Riboflavin Vitamin B2 , Thiamin Hydrochloride Vitamin B1 , Folic Acid.


Hmmmm ... Red No. 40. *drools* :oP
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
::Dunstickin
10/29/06 10:28 AM GMT
You missed WD40 off there Les?
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*Please forgive me, for not replying to every one of your lovely images-Problems with my hands is making it difficult at present* Dunstickin's Gallery
+Samatar
10/29/06 10:37 AM GMT
You couldn't figure out it would be hot yourself Bob?? Are you the one responsible for these warnings like "Coffee may be hot" and "Warning: Contains nuts" on airline peanut packets??? ;-)
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-Everyone is entitled to my opinion- rescope.com.au
.purmusic
10/29/06 10:43 AM GMT
Sam? Are you the one responsible for the warnings ...

"Caution: Excessive Sarcasm Just Ahead ... Please Wear Protective Ear and Eye Equipment." :oPPP (<--- No, it's not lost on me that this is an example as well, lol.)
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
+Samatar
10/29/06 10:46 AM GMT
LOLOL!!!

Reminds me of a Simpsons episode:

"Do I detect a hint of sarcasm??"
Professor Frink (examining strange looking device): "I'll say! This baby is off the scale!!!"
Comic Book Guy: "Oooh, a sarcasm detector. That's a REALLY usefull invention!!!"
*device explodes*
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-Everyone is entitled to my opinion- rescope.com.au
.purmusic
10/29/06 10:52 AM GMT
Lol.

I just noticed something ... in the official list of ingredients or product information I posted for the "Strawberry Pop Tarts"... Red No. 40 is listed twice. Is it a typo? Somehow ... I think not, lol.
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
+Samatar
10/29/06 10:55 AM GMT
I've never really been able to understand why food manufacturers insist on putting coloring in things that you don't even look at... like the inside of a pop tart, or those drinks in boxes they make for kids that you stick a straw into...
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-Everyone is entitled to my opinion- rescope.com.au
.purmusic
10/29/06 10:59 AM GMT
I always get a kick out of food manufacturers playing loosey goosey with semantics.

Ohh, this is "Lite" is it? Translation usually means ... 'yes, it is light-coloured compared to the original.'

EDIT: I said "loosey goosey" ... Yesssss! Got my 'Power Phrase' in for the day. :oP
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
+Samatar
10/29/06 11:01 AM GMT
I love the ones that say they are "99% fat free!" Why not just give your kids a bag of sugar, no fat in that and in many cases it's probably healthier!
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-Everyone is entitled to my opinion- rescope.com.au
::timw4mail
10/29/06 12:16 AM GMT
And granular sugar doesn't get stuck in your teeth ;øP
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"But shun profane and vain babblings: for they will increase unto more ungodliness." - 2 Timothy 2:16 (KJV) <- -> Timothy J. Warren | My homepage| My Gallery| My DeviantArt Gallery| AIM: aviat4ion
::third_eye
10/29/06 12:31 AM GMT
no, it melts and becomes a tarry substance, stored away in a crevice to rot your teeth away at a later point in time... much better than say, a pesky snack or granola bar ;-)
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lately, i've fallen horribly behind in my thanks and comments. I'll catch up, but until I do, please know all your kind words are greatly appreciated.
.CurtieBear
10/30/06 10:13 AM GMT
Well, this got me thinking about another "staple" of the junk food chain... Try THIS on for size.

Personally, I like em dipped in chocolate. Mmm-mmm
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Don't make me do VooDoo on you. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-haaaa
&KEIFER
10/30/06 10:34 AM GMT
plateoftheday.com

the number of people complaining about not getting three pieces of chicken .. when it's really two pieces (one cut) ....... and BROWNIES .. (with corn)
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.CurtieBear
10/30/06 11:36 AM GMT
LOL... to funny... reminds me of a story... stop me if ya heard it before... no? Good.

A freind of mine was at a Twins game, and had taken a break from the excitement to use the mens room. While in there, a dad and his son goes in. So, the kid goes into a stall, and while my friend is standing at the urinal (can I use that word? oh well...), he hears this plaintive little voice from the stall...

"Corn, daddy... Corn."
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Don't make me do VooDoo on you. Mwa-ha-ha-ha-haaaa
+Samatar
10/30/06 1:06 PM GMT
It's really quite remarkable that anyone who lives in the western world lives beyond 30 when you look at the utter crap we eat. PS I love that logo on the front of the Hungry Mn Dinner pack: ONE POUND OF FOOD! it proudly declares! (the "food" bit might be debatable I guess)
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-Everyone is entitled to my opinion- rescope.com.au
=Piner
10/30/06 1:32 PM GMT
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The work of art may have a moral effect, but to demand moral purpose from an artist is to make him ruin his work. (Johann Wolfgang von Goethe - 1832)
::laurengary
10/30/06 1:40 PM GMT
Who uses 2 knives to make a peanut butter & jelly sandwich ?
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I'm not only weird, but I'm gifted too ! ......CLICK TO SAVE LIVES ! .......MY GALLERY
.speedy_10
10/31/06 6:21 AM GMT
You of course
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| My Gallery | Contour Time :D -^- Image of the week: Right in Two -^- Tool (the band) are bloody awesome :.:
.purmusic
10/31/06 10:37 AM GMT
Lolol.

Whaa? You mean you don't use two knives?

*shudders at the thought of mixing peanut butter and jelly in the same jar via the same knife*

Heathens. :oP
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
gloopical
10/31/06 9:02 PM GMT
Oh my god... I just remembered this site I went on...

In Jamaica, they call speed bumps 'sleeping policemen'. So on one sign, it said "Warning - sleeping policemen ahead!"

And another one....

A sign said this:
"Please ignore this sign."
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I'm so slow, when life passes by, I never get a chance to live it.
&KEIFER
10/31/06 9:28 PM GMT
(*big exhalation*)
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gloopical
10/31/06 9:34 PM GMT
Wow. That is a disturbing brownie... who's clever idea was that to put it in the same box? In instant meals, you can't go for the teensy veggies.

But if you do, you're not supposed to leave them in the brown food.
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I'm so slow, when life passes by, I never get a chance to live it.
::stuffnstuff
11/02/06 6:30 AM GMT
Just out of curiosity, has anybody ever tried a Go-Tart(s?)? I haven't...
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Proofread carefully to see if you any words out.
&KEIFER
11/02/06 6:55 AM GMT
no, not a tart per se .. but a trollop, yes
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SMOKING can lead to management opportunities
.purmusic
11/02/06 7:01 AM GMT
LOL.

So you have ... visited Ohio? :oP
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The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes. - Marcel Proust
+Samatar
11/02/06 11:16 AM GMT
Mmmmm... Go-Trollop... delicious.
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-Everyone is entitled to my opinion- rescope.com.au
Icedtears
11/02/06 5:15 PM GMT
pop-tarts <3...

I wanna shake his hand for just plain coolness. You gotta be cool to find out about pop-tarts lol.
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[Wolfy][My Beautiful Lie..][</3] Feel free to email me!

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