As we plunge head long into the festive season, I thought it might be interesting to make predictions on events that could potentially occur before this time next year - so keep them as unlikely as possible whilst still maintaining the faintest whiff of credibility…..

#1. It will be announced that eating foods with bio cultures in them is, infact, terribly bad for you and will lead to long term medical problems.

#2. Michael Moore will suffer a sudden and fatal unexpected stroke/heart attack/accident before he can get his follow up to Fahrenheit 9/11 released.

#3. Scary Movie 7 will set the record for the shortest ever movie release on record weighing in at less than the length of it’s teaser trailer.

#4. Ford will go bankrupt and be bought out by a Tiger economy country.

#5. The hole in the ozone layer will be both the smallest it’s ever been and the biggest all in the same year - oh no wait - we did that already this year.

#6. KFC will make good on their promise to start producing genuinely healthy food .

#7. The Queen will use one of her few remaining powers to dissolve the British Government for not serving the publics interests.

#8. The truth will out that Princess Diana’s death wasn’t really an accident.

#9. Britney Spears will launch her own line of chav friendly budget Airstream trailers.

#10. The penny will drop that YouTube is just a pile of old cobblers and Google will find themselves billions out of pocket.

* hahaha I hope # 2 will turn out as TRUE!

* It will be scientifically proven that the air quality outside our homes is so dangerous, that nobody should go outside.....and INSIDE our homes, so saturated in RADON gasses that we all will have to weave a rope ladder to some other planet....:)

* I predict that there will be Caedesians who will wed {each other}......

* I predict that CHER, Courtney Love, and at least 23 other celebrities will get another facelift...

* I predict OJ Simpson will get slammed DEAD by a stray golf ball whilst playing on a FLORIDA golf course....and my dogs will not howl mournfully....

*I predict there will be a public lynching of "Dubya"..by his own party!

*Rush Limbaugh will o.d. on Oxycontin (sp) while in the process of slamming street drug users on his show.

*Ken Lay will be kicked out of Hell..they didnt want him down there either

*I too predict the wedding of Caedesians. But they won't know that they are both Caedesians! Oh, the irony.

*My friend Robyn will dye her hair another 5 times, beating this years record of 4 times.... and she will remove the red contact lenses. Scary they are...

*McDonalds will go out of buisness!!!

At least I can count. *smug look*

21) Canada, after much ballyhooing on the 'Hill' ... will still be ballyhooing and debating the Kyoto Protocol.

This I found interesting, as to how countries can meet their objectives.

"Emission targets can be met several ways. The most obvious way is to actually reduce greenhouse gas emissions – more fuel-efficient cars, fewer coal-fired power plants. But Kyoto also allows for three other mechanisms.

Countries can buy emissions credits from countries that don't need them to stay below their emissions quotas. A country can also earn emissions credits through something called joint implementation, which allows a country to benefit by carrying out something like a reforestation project in another industrialized country or "economy in transition." There's also what's called a clean development mechanism that encourages investment in developing countries by promoting the transfer of environmentally-friendly technologies."

And then this:

"What happens if a country fails to reach its Kyoto emissions target?

The Kyoto Protocol contains measures to assess performance and progress. It also contains some penalties. Countries that fail to meet their emissions targets by the end of the first commitment period (2012) must make up the difference plus a penalty of 30 per cent in the second commitment period. Their ability to sell credits under emissions trading will also be suspended."

22) Hybrid car market shares will plummet ... once Cameron Diaz finally marries Justin Timberlake.

23) I may ... may have posted another image. :oP

24) National Geographic will finally discover Terri (madmaven) and she will win accolades for her cover shots on that magazine.

25) I, again, won't make Time magazines cover as "Man of the Year." :(

26) Megadeth will release a new album! !!YaY!!

!! YaY !!

27) Microsoft will start implementing a pay for service service for pay for service. Phasing out support for allll services and support ... that is, unless you sign over the deed to your house.

Annnnnd ... sign a pact that gives them first dibs on your soul upon passing onto the next life ... where you then, must first install the necessary updates to the afterlife ... before continuing your existence on that metaphysical plain.

28. Computers will get into our minds and take over the universe...*cough*

29. Richard Hammod will go suicidal and try to break the world land speed, AGAIN...

30. I may...have a 600cc bike by the end of the year...*cries with hope..*

31) Used cooking oil ... will still be used cooking oil, not the alternative fuel source some thought it might be.

32) Venture capital companies will take a hit and go off in search of the next new thing to throw money at.

33) The price of a crude barrel of oil will skyrocket and economics texts have a new entry for inclusion into the category of luxury goods ... that up until then ... was limited to precious metals, jewels, furs and the like.

34) McDonalds' will introduce a new new healthier menu ... that includes items such as, but not limited to ... cardboard wrapped in a pita ... with remnants of lettuce casually thrown on top ... with a light vinaigrette dressing made from used cooking oil.

Before I continue the list, I must say that my PE teacher is called Richard Hammond. Then, when I went on holiday, we saw his identical twin as a holiday entertainer. V. scary.

35) Everyone will forget what a post-it-note is.

36) Michael Jackson will go broke.

michael jackson is already broke.

Oh yeah...

Sorry, I'm on paracetomol.

37) Stores will begin displaying their full lines of Christmas merch in August

38) my life will be totally different ;)

39) I will become much, much better friends with Jacqueline ... as sales take off of her creative endeavours. ;o)

40) Lol ... with Cat ... Christmas wares will be displayed year round as retailers see the 'potential' in depressing us even further. :oP

41) Another valid and 'living' lifeform will be discovered in the galaxy. His name will be Fred.

The Nazi's will......well they just will.

The Nazis always do.

41. I will eat or consume more lollipops at college than this year...

which is ALOT!

42. Britney spears...will yet again dye her hair another colour and stupidly have another baby...

43. Discussions will still be taking place on whether we did the right thing when it came to Iraq...I wish they'd shut up already lol.

44. Victoria and David Beckham will have another child, a boy, calling him MacBeth.

LOL ... and some more LOL.

Nice.

45) Kanye West will take up another career aspiration ... behind the counter of Taco Bell. He won't last long there either.

46) Microsoft will have released Vista...maybe

47) I will still remember you all, despite my enourmous wealth and international stardom.

*double checks to see if this is 12 months, or twelve..lifetimes..*

48. We will still be taking about a year on in a year!!

49. In a year's time I'll still be in college wishing I was rich from the ultimate knowledge I posses.

#50. After their Origami and new Zune debacles, Microsoft will finally admit they are pretty crap at most things outside their core business.

51. I will have made 106 more paper swans, and learnt how to make fingertraps.

ooo pretty

52. I will still have silly taste in music and still be called a liar... ''i like all genres of music...''...''liar'' buggery of...please.

53.MSN will be on beta 10.2 ( you watch...lol)

I like all genres of music... except rap... to me, it sounds a bit samey.

54. I will start crying due to my MSN deciding that it is going to block my friends every time I log on (all 238 of them) and that I have to unblock each one manually.

ahhh poor gloop...i hate my msn...i have to use 7.5...because live is all spazzy but either way i can never accept transfers or see display pictures...le sigh...

55. msn will be just as crap as it is now.

Um... what else...

56. When asked for permission to make steak for dinner, George Bush will once again not condone the killing of innocent lives. *hypocrite...*

57) Tom Cruise will change his name to ... Tom Cruise ... in a severely misguided publicists' ploy to gain back his 'fans.'

58) The Hubble Telescope will be retrieved ... and sent to Lenscrafters' for some 'repair' work. (Can't wait to see them make good on their 'one hour service ... or free' promise. :oP)

59) The scientific community will be stunned ... by the revelation that the cookie is the most fundamental building block in the genome. Unearthed by accident when Fred the janitor, while on his usual night shift ... starts to play around with 'stuff.' :o))

60. People will still be worrying about the environment...but still not doing anything about it.

61. Tony Blair...will still be clingy desperately to prime minister position...while everyone else wants him to bugger off.

62. The world will finally realise that we don't need chavs and they will all convert to the following: emos, goths, greebos, normal, freaks, geeks, hippies, indies etc etc...

lol!

Preferably grebe, because then I can have some new friends. Yay!

63. Once again, a mad scientist will predict the end of the world, but this time it will be true. True, I tell ya! TRUE!!! *muahaha*

greebs here are apprently dirty smelly people...so im not sure on that one...

apprently im emo..0.o...but i haven't cried in a long while...so .0.o

lol...anywhooo...

64. Bus prices will still be as expensive as they are now...while lucky old people get it free....while KIDS dont... ¬_¬

Then again, the only reason old people get it free is that most think 20p is a lot of money, and would go into shock if they saw the prices we have to pay.

And grebes aren't smelly! I'm definitely not emo, because... well, I don't dress emo. And I can't cry, however sad I feel. The only time I cry is when I get injections, and sometimes I go into shock after those anyways.

We attacked a bunch of grebes today, because every day they come and pick up our lil' friend Charlie, and today he just couldn't take it and started crying. Sounds wimpy, but it wasn't. It was more frusturation tears than anything. But nobody messes with my friends, so we walked over to them and started to beat them up. It was hilarious.

65. 549 people will choke on the seeds in seedless grapes.

'lucky old people' ? 'would go into shock if they saw the prices we have to pay' ?

these 'lucky' people have been paying all their lives so it isnt too much to ask that they be given the odd freebie from the state they have paid taxes to for as long as they can remember. Taxes - thats what happens when you grow up and make a positive contribution to your society - one for you to remember for future reference.

66) Gemma and Steph ... will get done told. :oP

67) Actuaries will throw up their collective hands and say to allll world governments in light of fiscal policies and expenditures ... "we give up" ... "we're going fishing and to drink alot of beer."

68) My paper route ... will be abolished. :o(

Sorry... I learned my lesson. I'm probably just in a bad mood because nobody will let me contribute to society.

69. Teeheehee... 69... Sorry... Um... I will finally bring out a book!

70) The number 69 will have it's reference amended and will be simply relegated to what it was in the past. The number that follows 68. *giggles*

71) A new TV technology will be introduced. Surpassing plasma and LCD screens in price only. It will be made up of fish scales with twice the luminosity of beetle wings.

72 . I predict I will wake up...and run to the PC and get straight into CAEDES site.....:)

73) Terri and me will have a torrid affair. She leaves me reluctantly when I can't 'boot' as fast as she would like. In my place ... she takes Tim as her young lover. :oP

74) Tim sees the light ... and comes over to the darkside ... and embraces IE 10.
(With tabs, full compatability with allll websites annnnd ... a built-in code workaround for his site. The 'back button' experiences a short-lived resurrection with the 2 people that inadvertently ended up on Tim's site from time to time ... because of being slightly dyslexic. They were actually looking for Tom's site.)

terri and me? ... that's poor englitch

For your consideration. Bottom paragraph.

(** And a word of caution; the site linked above contains some words in the text therein, that may offend. That is, if you were to read all of it. Nothing profoundly vulgar ... just a little off colour. Keith and me don't mind ... you might ... and you been done told. :oP)

oh! .. your dangling participle is showing

*checks fly*

Yeah, yeah ... made me look, hahaha. :oP

hahahaha i could never leave a guy with a dangling participle....