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You've Probably Heard It Before....

::philcUK
06/01/04 3:37 PM GMT
Dear Technical Support,

18 months ago, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from Drinking Mates 4.2, which I had used for years without any trouble.

However, there are apparently conflicts between these two products, and the only solution was to try and run Girlfriend 1.0 with the sound turned off. To make matters worse, Girlfriend 1.0 is incompatible with several other applications, such as Lads Night Out 3.1, Football 3.0, and Playboy 6.9.

Successive versions of Girlfriend proved no better.

A shareware program, Party Girl 2.1, which I tried, had many bugs and left a virus in my system, forcing me to shut down completely for several weeks.

Eventually, I tried to run Girlfriend 1.2 and Girlfriend 1.0 at the same time, only to discover that when these two systems detected each other, they caused severe damage to my hardware.

I then upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, only to discover that this product soon had to be upgraded further to Wife 1.0. Whilst Wife 1.0 tends to use up all my available resources, it does come bundled with Free Sex Plus and Cleanhouse 2003.

Shortly after this upgrade, however, I found that Wife 1.0 can be very unstable and costly to run. Any mistakes I made were automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and could not be deleted. They then resurfaced months later when I had forgotten about them.

Wife 1.0 also has an automatic Diary, Explorer and E-mail Filter and can, without warning, launch TurboStrop and WhingeExcel. These latter products have no Help files, and I have to try to guess what the problem is.

Additional problems are that Wife 1.0 needs updating regularly, Requiring ShoeShop Browser for new attachments and Hairstyle Express which needs to be reinstalled every other week.

Wife 1.0 also spawns unwelcome child processes that drain my resources. These conflict with some of the new games I wanted to try out, warning me that they are an illegal operation.

Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches Itself to my Audi TT hard drive, it often crashes. Wife 1.0 also comes with a rather annoying pop-up called Mother-In-Law, which can't be turned off.

Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2003, but there could be problems. A friend of mine has alerted me to the fact that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2003, it tends to delete all of your Money files before uninstalling itself.

Any help on this matter would be most gratefully received.
0∈ [?]
"Some mornings, it's just not worth chewing through the leather straps"

Comments

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Warrior_of_the_Eceni
06/01/04 10:20 PM GMT
HAHAHAHAHAHA, oh thats funny, At first I was like, what programs are those, then I got it:-)
0∈ [?]
The truth may be out there, but the lies are inside your head. -Terry Pratchett,
cemkarahan
06/04/04 10:19 AM GMT
FUN....L.O.V.L...... : ))))) Great...
0∈ [?]
Happiness is a behaviour.Sadness too.Make your mind CemKarahan
slamminheadpains101
06/06/04 7:48 AM GMT
that was good...
0∈ [?]
~muwahahahahaha! The little men will rise and you will all be crushed!~

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