Ok, so here goes; I don't really like airing my...difficulties, I'd rather be the stoic type, but I have my kids to consider. My husband is in the military reserves and we just found out that he will be leaving for South West Asia in 3 weeks for about 16 months. Is there anyone here in a similar situation that can give me advice on how to prepare my sons? One is 5 and the other is 8 months. The baby will cope ok, but I'm worried that he will forget who his daddy is. Please offer any suggestions. Thanks.

Lot's of pictures and talk of daddy while he's gone. I think babies are pretty receptive to that sort of thing. Hopefully the kids' relationships with their dad will be stronger when he returns than even when he left :)

Thanks, I hope so.

i don't know if this will help but my uncle just got back from iraq and he had two sons, and whenever they missed him my aunt would tell them that he is out serving his country and that they have to share him but he will be back soon, and they wrote lots of letters back and forth. Her sons sent lots of artwork and there own personal letters as a update and let you know you are missed, and whenever possible let them talk on the phone as well, hope that was helpful, and God bless you and your family

would investing in a videophone be feasible?

Thanks Gabi, and I'm glad that your uncle came home safe. I don't know about the videophone Phil. I don't know how frequently he will have access to one on his end. HIs Unit says they will set up video confrencing once every three months; but it's worth looking into. Thanks to both of you.

I wish I could remember where I saw this ;( but, last year when the war began I read about a program that filmed the parent reading storybooks to their children and then videotaped the children as well and sent it back to the parent. Perhaps you could have your husband make tapes before he leaves. A "story a day" type thing? I will continue to search for that program and link. I feel the book idea is good in that it is not a highly emotional tape but a wonderful experience of sharing between parent and child.

http://www.read2kids.org/uniting.htm

Yay Tracy! Thank you!! ;)

Thanks Tracy and B.J. that is a really clever idea. My older son loves a story before bed, that would be a nice reminder. Aurora

Aurora, I wish you and your young family well. I can't begin to imagine how difficult this will be. Being "stoic" sure does go out the window when the heart of you is in your children and also so far away with your husband. I know you will receive much support and I applaud you for having the courage to ask for it. Prayers and angels to you.

Hi Aurora....I cannot imagine what it would be like to inhabit your shoes right now. My heart & prayers go out to you, your children & your husband. Please don't be 'stoic' with us...we care at caedes.net. I want to know how you & your family & your hubby are doing during these difficult times and I am sure that there are other members who have that same thought. The book video is a great idea....it gives the kids a sense of normalcy when nothing is normal. Their routine will have Daddy present. Our grandson is serving in Iraq & his Mom sends him disposable cameras so he can take pictures of where he 'lives', he has his buddies take pics of him & some of them & then he sends the camera back to her for developement. It makes her feel like she knows more about what he is doing even though he is limited by security. This might work for your hubby. The kids could then look forward to the "Daddy-cam" arriving in the mail. Don't forget to let the kids help pack goodie bags to send to Daddy....baby wipes, etc. You know the routine better than anyone. They can enclose photo's of themselves also. I think by allowing them to participate in a many ways will help them cope too! Best of luck to you & please keep us posted. I care :)

Thank you very much for your concern and kind words. I will definately have the boys help in the care packages. I will keep you up to date on how things are. I cannot express how much your response means to me. Thank you again.
~Aurora

Aurora, my heart goes out to you and your family. My thoughts and prayers are with you also. The only advice I can give is to pray, pray, pray each one for the other. Send him with lots of hidden love letters through his bags to surprise him when he may need it the most. Be strong for the children and show them every day how proud you are of their daddy! Nothing means more to children than knowing their parents love one another, even if they need to be apart.
JuneBug

Thanks June. The letters are a clever idea. That ought to cheer him up, and me too when I hide them. Much appreciated.
~Aurora

No better time to be a hopeless romantic than when he will be needing it the most. ie)in his socks, lol.; shirt pockets and anywhere silly that you can think of.
Good luck with it all.
June

/is ex forces

Best way of keeping that bond strong is letters, lots & lots of them.

It has many benefits too, keeps daddies morale up, teaches the kids about writing more etc, so it's good all around. =]

Maybe getting the kids too keep some form of journal or diary is a good idea, that way they always have something too share or say/write about. Also buy them a cheap camera so they can take snapshots too send on, which is always a nice touch.

Hope that helps in some way.

Thanks Taz, I think giving the kids, well, the older one a disposable camara is a good idea. That way he can take pics at school to send to his daddy. And you are right, having him write the letters would be a great two-for-one. Thank you for your support and have a nice Tuesday,
~Aurora

Anything for the troops, so most welcome. (:

& give the younger one/s a disposble camera too, could make him laugh getting some silly pics from the eyes of his younger child/ren hehehehe.

Hope it all goes smoothly & the time passes fast. =]

If any of your children are too young for writing or don't express themselves this way - what about artworks? a drawing of their world or experiences could be something to communicate more than words alone do.
All the best, Mum42.