A man who goes into a restaurant and blatantly disrespects the servers shows a strong discontent with his own being. Deep down he knows that restaurant service is the closest thing he will ever experience to being served like a king.
Criss Jami, Killosophy

Behind the counter sat one of those absolutely inimitable and indomitable ladies, produced only in the city of Paris, but produced there in great numbers, who would be as outraged and unsettling in any other city as a mermaid on a mountain‐top. All over Paris they sit behind their counters like a mother bird in a nest and brood over the cash‐register as though it were an egg. Nothing occurring under the circle of heaven where they sit escapes their eye, if they have ever been surprised by anything, it was only in a dream ‐ a dream they long ago ceased having. They are neither ill‐nor good‐natured, though they have their days and styles, and they know, in the way, apparently, that other people know when they have to go to the bathroom, everything about everyone who enters their domain. Though some are white‐haired and some not, some fat, some thin, some grandmothers and some but lately virgins, they all have exactly the same shrewd, vacant, all‐registering eye; it is difficult to believe that they ever cried for milk, or looked at the sun; it seems they must have come into the world hungry for banknotes, and squinting helplessly, unable to focus their eyes until they came to rest on a cash‐register.
James Baldwin, Giovanni's Room

The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Steven Wright

The other night I ate at a real nice family restaurant. Every table had an argument going.
George Carlin

Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes Tuesdays, I go Fridays.
Henry Youngman

Coffee And TV, Blur

champagne problems, Taylor Swift

Brown Sugar, The Rolling Stones